Archives for Bridal Shower Favors
Tea Pot Tape Measures
October 24, 2007
For the last twenty minutes I’ve been racking my brain trying to think of a time when I was out and had just my purse (thus I am not at home where I have a regular tape measure) and I really, really needed to measure something. Ikea? No, they have free paper tape measures. Plus, all of the tags list product dimensions. . . . Am still thinking. Pretty much all shopping is out. If someone is selling you something, they can probably tell you the height or length or depth of the product.
I give up. When could I use this?
Ladies will be pleasantly surprised to receive this truly fitting find, a miniature little white teapot that’s more than just a keychain. Gals can hook them onto their keys or slip them into a purse and when they need to…they can measure up some fun!
I cannot stop picturing a really, really awkward evening at the Chippendales Club. Just imagine all of your gal friends getting trashed and then whipping their favors to ‘measure up some fun’ with the dancers. If that’s your vision for a bridal shower (Maids of Honor, I’m looking at you), these favors are just $1.65 each for your first 1-23, available at Wedding FAVORites.
Categories: Wedding Favors, Bridal Shower Favors | 7 Comments »
Burberry-style Sewing Kits
August 8, 2007
The greatest trap in selecting a wedding favor or gift is believing that if you get something that could possibly be considered ‘useful’ then it will be appreciated. Other enormous errors? Selecting faux-Burberry items for your bridesmaids. Yeah, yeah, you want them to all have mini sewing kits just in case something goes disastrously wrong and you need a team of people to stitch you back into your gown, but passing it off as a gift is pretty ridiculous.
Also ridiculous: thinking that those tiny scissors will be able to cut anything. Have you ever tried to use the tiny scissors that come with sewing kits? It’s more difficult than trying to get a cat to mate with a moose.
Yes, that difficult.
If you are willing to try, you can purchase these for just $1.65 each from American Bridal. Of course, you have to buy a minimum of 24, which means that I would have to give every female person I know one of these just to get rid of them all.
Categories: Bridesmaid Gifts, Bridal Shower Favors, Bridal Party Gifts | No Comments »
Custom Personalized M&M Candies
July 17, 2007
Admit it, you’ve been thinking about personalized M&Ms since he proposed. Specifically, you’ve been thinking about Tiffany Blue M&M’s. Tiffany Blue M&Ms printed with your wedding date and the names of you and your betrothed.
Well, I hope that your fiance isn’t named Crap, because that’s one word that’s not allowed. In fact, the M&Ms people have an entired guide to what is an isn’t allowed. Here are my favorite parts of the guide:
While we encourage your creativity, Masterfoods USA will not honor a request to print any “objectionable” language, acronyms, symbols, pictures, or any other graphic representation. “Objectionable” means, among other things, anything that (i) is libelous, defamatory, pornographic, sexually explicit, unlawful, racially or ethnically offensive, (ii) infringes on someone else’s patent, copyright, trademark, trade secret or other property right, (iii) is something people would consider harassing, abusive, threatening, harmful, vulgar, profane, obscene, or violent, (iv) would breach a person’s privacy or publicity rights, (v) is a misrepresentation of facts, (vi) hate speech, (vii) encourages others to break the law in any way, or (viii) is otherwise inappropriate.
Have fun with custom printed M&M’S® Candies.
Yes, it ends with ‘Have fun with custom printed M&M’S® candies.’ As in ‘Listen future Mr. Larry Flint, we are not turning our candy shop into your own personalized mini-version of Hustler, but have a good time trying to figure out something witty and inoffensive that you’d like to have on some crazy-expensive candies.’ If you do try to put something obscene on an M&M’S® candy, look out! I got an error message smackdown:
These M&M’S® are not priced for the faint of heart or lean of wallet. The M&M’S® store charges $11.99 for each 7 ounce bag, with a minimum purchase of 4 bags. Add to that a shipping charge of $12.95 (they’re delivered by a unicorn) and you’ve got 28 ounces of M&M’S® for just $60.91.
Categories: Wedding Favors, Bridesmaid Gifts, Bridal Shower Favors, Tiffany, Bridal Party Gifts | 2 Comments »
Like a Candle in the Wind
June 19, 2007
I can tell that George Bush did a terrific job brainwashing everyone during the 2004 campaign because I still see images of John Kerry when I hear the word ‘flip-flop.’ And really, who wants to be bombarded by images of John Kerry every time someone starts talking about summer footwear? I feel like I’m being haunted by puffy gray hair and an enormous chin.
Fortunately for my weird imagination, the folks over at Jessica’s Wedding have figured out a way to combine flip-flops and wedding-favor ideas in a manner that in no way makes me think of presidential contenders. Instead, these flip-flop-style candles have me humming Elton John’s Candle in the Wind and picturing Princess Di.
This of course leads to the pondering of her sons, who are not that hot, but are princes, which has people describing them as hot even though they’re both pretty average-looking and could easily be confused for a couple of frat boys from South Carolina.
If you really, really want these candles, pick them up at Jessica’s Wedding for just $5.95 for a set of four. I do not know if ’set of four’ means eight total sandals (four pair) or four sandals. You’ll just have to try your luck.
Categories: Wedding Favors, Bridal Shower Favors, Bridal Party Gifts, Beach and Island, Seashore and Ocean | 1 Comment »
Embossed Sea Shell Wedding Favors
June 4, 2007
Truly romantic weddings deserve truly romantic decorations and favors. What better way to show your love than with the dried exoskeleton of a bivalve?
Well, I’ll tell you what’s better: the same lovely shells printed with your names! Embossed shells are more indicative of marital fidelity because they display a love important enough to be laser engraved on the carapace of a long-dead animal. That’s real devotion. Every wedding guest will feel honored to leave with an item embossed with the names of the couple, even if they’ll eventually leave them in the hotel bathroom after playing a rousing fantasy session of Gilligan’s Island.
These favors from Beau Coup read “Our love shell last forever” and come in at just $3.00 each (minimum order of 12). I can’t imagine a better way for newlyweds everywhere to display their eternal love and affection.
Categories: Wedding Favors, Bridal Shower Favors, Wedding Decorations, Beach and Island | No Comments »