Archive for April 2008
Garters, who needs ‘em?
April 13, 2008
When I think about garters I think “Do I want a lace-covered rubber band wrapped around my thigh for the duration of my wedding ceremony, only to be removed publicly?”
Uh, no. I don’t need my brand-new-groom to symbolically deflower me in front of the wedding guests. Aside from giving everyone a weirdly intimate indication of what might happen later that night, garters are useless.
Unless they hold a flask or wallet. Then garters are freaking awesome. Except that I don’t plan on being trashed at my wedding. And sorry, girlfriends who I love but am not asking to be bridesmaids, I’m not getting these for you either. So when would I have a chance to use this incredible device?
Maybe for baseball games? Can you imagine how much money you’d save if instead of buying $8.00 beers at the Giants game you brought a flask or two of whiskey? We’re talking about hundreds of dollars in savings if you switch to rum and cokes. Now that’s an accessory I can believe in.
If you’re a Bay Area Bride, you can pick up a garter flask at Dollhouse Bettie (home of crazy-enormous panties I hope to never wear) or Mingle, those of you who don’t live here in the land of protests can stop by the online Juliette Garter Shop.
Categories: Wedding Accessories, Bachelorette Party | 17 Comments »